Celebrating Success

It was back in August, the week of my one year heart-i-versary, that my dear friend, Jodi, took a series of heart pictures to celebrate my one year mark of my miracle. I was a little bummed that I forgot my earrings and lipstick for part of the photo shoot, but the pictures came out so beautifully, that I am not at all worried about those minor things missing. I am SO grateful for the pictures I was blessed to have taken to show my progress. I am in awe of the progress my body has made this past year. I look in the mirror and am astounded at the change of coloring, the healthy hair, the eye lashes growing back.

When my heart first started spiraling out of control, I drastically put on a whopping 40 pounds in 2 months... and this was while exercising regularly! Over the years, as my heart was not functioning properly, it was very difficult to get that extra weight off, although I exercised all the time. More frustrating to me was that I had always been slender and active, until things took the sour turn for the worst. Now that my body is functioning properly, I am setting more and more goals of things I want to accomplish with my health. The most recent was to reach a mark of losing a little more than half that weight I had gained. I am happy to say that since these pictures were taken, I have lost another 9 pounds. This morning, my total loss of the 40 pounds (which I began keeping track of in January) is 23 pounds!! I am thrilled that God has blessed me to have this success. I am grateful for the friend who provided her beautiful tree for these pictures. I am thankful for my friend, who helped bring out the beauty of my grateful, healthy soul.

My name is Jenny McKinney. I am a survivor.... and I just had some chocolate!

More Than a Year

The Ladies in the 'Hood

I missed writing it- about my one year heart-iversary, mostly because August was a really busy month. Then, my laptop crashed and to be truthful, I do not enjoy blogging on the family computer. I decided before anymore time passes, I should share, because my one year was so great and I feel very blessed. God is good to me, of this there is no doubt.

August 12th of last year, I went in for my surgery and had my miracle. August 12th this year was wonderful! I was able to spend the day with ladies in my neighborhood, making freezer meals for a darling family I have come to know and love deeply. They had a preemie baby at 27 weeks and the mama then suffered from a bad infection. The baby still fights for his life every day. We wanted to do something to help. What better way to show God gratitude than by serving His children?

Linda and I

That evening, some girlfriends in the neighborhood took me out for ice cream. I loved being with these ladies! They made me feel so blessed to live where I do. We went around the table and shared a little about each of ourselves. It was so fun to get to know them better! Of course, Linda was my server. It seems every time I have gone to this place of deliciousness, she takes my order. We have become pals and always delight in seeing each other. On the way home, my young friend, Macady, and I took some fun pictures of ourselves in the car. (Scroll down)

When I got home, the Hubby also surprised me with some gorgeous flowers to commemorate! How did I get so dang blessed?!

Beautiful!

The weekend took my family back to Nampa, Idaho. My best girlfriend, Debbie, had her son returning home from his mission for the LDS Church and we wanted to be a part of that homecoming. Saturday morning, my darling friend, Kati threw me a heart luncheon after we had family pictures taken in the morning. (Along with the family pictures, I had my one year heart pictures taken.) I had about 30 women and even a few men come to celebrate the miracle of my heart. We had homemade guacamole with chips, chicken salad on crackers, and so much fun

Lovely Roses

and laughter! It was incredible to be back home and show off my new heart that God granted me. Nampa was the place we lived during the years that I was so sick. These were the friends who took care of me. To be able to sit there with them and just relax without any health concerns was such an incredible blessing!(I will post these pictures in my next few entries.)

Later in the month, The Hubby and I finally got to go celebrate my heartiversary. We went to really test what my heart can endure when we went to see the movie "Into the Storm". WOW!! That was INTENSE!! I have a fascination with end-of-the-world type movies and this one is (so far) at the top of my list. I do not think I stopped squeezing his hand for more than two minutes. It was a wonderful way to spend time together, and just being... alive.

The next evening, I had my last celebration for the month. I invited a few girlfriends to go out for a special dinner at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building in downtown SLC. Not everyone was able to make it, but those that came had a lovely time. The reason I invited these particular friends was because their actions and love took on a deeper meaning in my healing process. These were those friends who held my hand through everything as I healed physically and emotionally form my heart trauma. Sometimes, you just have to celebrate a little bit differently with certain people in your life.

I am SO happy to be here to celebrate, to serve, and to enjoy life! God is so Good and knows what we each need. His plan is perfect. Time for me to share more and get back on the blogging wagon again!

My name is Jenny McKinney. I AM A SURVIVOR!! Here's to one year and eternity to come... and I really want some chocolate!! 

A Sneak Peak into the upcoming pictures!

Heaven's New Angels

Lindsay

I cannot write much today. My heart is deeply grieving and I really do not have any words.

Ryder

It is a sacred place- to be in the heart community. There we fight together, laugh together, grieve together. Today, we are grieving that two more Heart Warriors have been called Home. 

A few days ago, Lindsay joined the angels. Last night, Ryder joined his friend. These previous fighters were just babies, yet they changed countless lives. May God bring comfort to the families of these warrior souls. Lindsay and Ryder, you will forever be loved and always be missed.

 

My name is Jenny McKinney. I am honored to be among the Heart Warriors. There is no need for chocolate this day.

Shake Your Booty

A couple of years ago, I was lying in bed, having a terrible time with my heart. My little girl - then 5 - cuddled with me and wanted to understand what it was doing. Saying a quick prayer that I would know how to answer her without scaring her, her young brain and old soul would grasp things I could not even comprehend yet. Inspired, I walked, ran, danced, my fingers along the blanket and explained, "Sometimes my heart walks; sometimes it runs, sometimes it dances. Sometimes it tries to do all at the same time. Sometimes when it is supposed to be walking it runs, then dances, then walks. Sometimes when it is supposed to run, it walks dances, stops to shake its booty, then walks again, shakes its booty, dances, jumps, flips, shakes its booty, because my heart cannot make up its mind!" By that point we were laughing so hard, tears were coming down our cheeks. It especially lifted me spirits when Princess B got up and pretended to be my heart, acting out what my hand just did. Talk about adorable! How grateful I am that she was able to join our family before my heart prevented me from bringing her into this world.

We had a lot of fun being silly as we talked about all the things my heart was trying to do. This video would have been most helpful to teach her about heart rhythms. It is not meant to offend, but hopefully be a tool and bring a little smile to your face as these doctors use their bodies to explain a few rhythms.

Life is so serious so much of the time. Yet often, in the midst of the trials, there is so much joy to be found, if only we are open to receiving it. I hope the video brings you a little joy.

My name is Jenny McKinney. I used to have a funny heart rhythm. Now I just have funny cravings for chocolate.

Post by Ólína Björg.

5K a-coming!!

I did it!! I FINALLY registered for a 5K!! This may not be the marathon I planned on running this fall, but it sure is a big step towards that ultimate goal. Intermountain Healing Hearts is hosting this run and walk. You should come do it with me! You even get a t-shirt!! YEAH!! I cannot WAIT! Saturday, September 6th... I will be there celebrating my healthy heart. Who's with me?!

My name is Jenny McKinney. My heart is healthy and I am going to CELEBRATE... with chocolate!

To the Vampires Who Cared...

Saturday was a truly monumental day for me. I was a the homeschooling fair that (by default) I was in charge of. One of the committee members arranged to have the American Red Cross come with their bus for a blood drive. As I went to welcome the blood (aka: vampire) crew, I told the woman in charge that I really wanted to donate, but... and I let her know about the heart challenge last year. I expressed that I did not know if I would "pass" the test to donate. She encouraged me to come and see what we could figure out.

I have not been able to donate for over 5 years, because of my heart. In fact, I remember the last time I attempted to. It was at our church building in Nampa, ID. I went through the list of questions and sadly, things were bad enough with my heart that they had to excuse me from giving my blood away- blood that is a rare type and always in need. This time, though, I was determined to pass the test by sure will.

In the evening, I stood at the event microphone and announced the Red Cross needed 2-3 more volunteers to reach their goal for the day. I was going to attend, who was with me? I went back to the vampire bus. (Actually, I am pretty sure it hurt less than an actual vampire bite would.) As I sat and chatted with the gal in charge we not only had a few giggles over some of the questions, but we found out that- I PASSED!! I was able to donate blood! My heart is FINALLY well enough to give this service! Oh, I was thrilled!

After the questions were finished, I went to lie down on the bed, where the needle was (gulp) inserted (not a huge fan of needles) and the blood was taken from me, like a anteater sucking up it's favorite creatures. I was able to donate a full pint in 5 1/2 minutes- better than the average. While I was lying there, squeezing the little stress ball that helps my blood release easier, I had a nice chat with the man who was taking care of me at that point. He is a big, burly, teddy bear of a man. He wears a dark purple stethoscope and recently bought himself a dark purple, metallic Harley!! Who wouldn't when it is your favorite color? I would LOVE to see that bike!!

As the vampires no longer ask what type of blood one has, I offered the information. "O negative with an Rh negative factor," is what I told them. "They are going to LOVE you!" was the response. (From my understanding, my type of blood is the rarest, and it is also universal, so that makes me a prime donor.) We finished up my transfusion.... I mean donation... and I went on my way. Amazingly enough, I was not even dizzy. I was allergic to all the foods they offered, so I just went back to my table at the fair to eat my sun-warmed strawberries. Yum! (Not really.)

The vampires were superb. I shared with them a little of WHY I was SO emotional over donating blood. They were happy I was there, as was I.

A few of us Blood Heroes. I am on the far right.

It was easy, peasy to donate. The hardest part was answering the questions, as some of them made me giggle... a lot! If you are in the kind of health needed to donate, I suggest you do it! You get to be a Blood Hero because the blood you donate will absolutely save a life one day!  To the vampires who cared, thank you. Your caring about my healthy heart made me feel loved.

My name is Jenny McKinney. I can donate blood again... and vampires care enough to have chocolate cookies for you! Chocolate! Yum!!

Still Learning

As I think about growing up in Mesa, Arizona, I recall how I spent my summer days outside. 122 degrees or not, you could find me in the neighborhood swimming pool, climbing trees, or running barefoot through the field, even racing barefoot down the blacktop. Our family struggled financially, but we had a home to live in. We had our set of struggles for sure, but in looking back, I can remember many carefree days. We had no idea my heart would eventually be a ticking time bomb from a CHD that would lie dormant until I was an adult. I sometimes have wondered how much the strep infections I had lead the the weakening of my heart. Curiously, my heart now beats strong, with numerous days ahead- too many to count.

There are days when it is hard for me to believe that I am approaching the one year anniversary of my successful heart surgery. Where has the time gone? I am finally coming out of the struggle I've had of of not knowing which direction to take my life. Although it has taken a long time, I finally understand why God chose to spare me. I have a mission I have not yet completed. I have lives to touch, lessons to learn, others to assist. I cannot yet be as the angels when God still needs me here. The storms still rage around me, but there is peace in knowing where I am going. As long as I put my trust in God, He will guide me with His loving hand. Also, I am getting a bit excited, because I am going to be celebrating my one year heartiversary in a big way! I look forward to the new memories with a happy, healthy heart.

My own experiences are bringing me to people that have changed me life for good, people I would have not met otherwise. I have made some new friends who live just down the sidewalk from me. They have a brand new baby, just a month old. When he went in for his one week check-up, they learned he has a condition called Total Anomalous Pulmonary Venous Return (TAPVR).  He was life-flighted from the doctors office to the Primary Children's Hospital (PCH) where they have one of the best cardiac heart teams in the country, if not the world. There, he had to have emergency open heart surgery (OHS) in order to live. Last night, they had to take their baby back to the hospital last night to admit him for an infection. During that time, I had the blessing of watching their eldest, barely two years old. I was in awe of the faith the parents of these baby boys carry. They have full trust in the doctors and in God that whatever is to come is supposed to be. Some may say they are naive. I say their faith is refreshing!

Late last night, after the parents came to pick up their eldest son, I sat down to research TAPVR. I found this website which is great at helping one learn about the various defects. During my research, I learned that there are 49 Congenital Heart Defects (CHD). FORTY-NINE!!! Do you know that 1 in 100 children are born with a CHD? My defect, ARVD, is classified under Electrophysiology Defects. Although I am no longer struggling with mine, I still read up on it, so I understand it better. This information may be critical in months and years to come.

It is not until now I have publicly shared some information. Until now, I was hoping there is nothing to tell. Yet, I feel compelled to share it, for there may be another mother who is enduring the same emotional turmoil that this mother's heart is feeling. There is a 50/50 chance my children will have my genetic condition. So far, my two eldest have not shown any signs. My third, however, is showing nearly every one. Curiosity strikes my spirit strongly as my husband and I prepare for our youngest son to see the cardiologist. On August 6th, we will take him to see a leading cardiologist at PCH. From there, it will be determined what tests are necessary, if any, to learn of the functions of his heart. As a mother and a CHD survivor, I know, I know there is something not quite right. I see it when he wakes up from a deep sleep and his heart is racing at more than 130 BPM. I see it when he walks down the hall, suddenly becoming super fatigued. I see it when we are out hiking together and I check his heart rate, where it has drastically dropped to the low 60's. Something is not quite right. I was hoping it was years before we would have to face this again, if ever. The time has come much sooner than I anticipated, especially only learning a year ago that one or more of my children may dace the same future as I. I just pray for strength on his behalf that whatever we are facing, he will survive.... that we will survive.

I know it is God's will in whatever is to come. He created B-Man's heart and mind. God knew what He was doing when He wired B-Man's brain in such a way that modern doctors would tell us he has autism. This same Creator also knew what He was doing when He put this exact heart in B-Man's body. It is a perfect heart- perfect for whatever lessons B needs to learn in this life and what God needs us to learn as well. God is perfect in His knowledge, even if we are not. Peace does not evade me, but instead permeates my soul. God is with us, walking this road- no matter where it leads.

My name is Jenny McKinney. I am a heart warrior, and possibly a heart mom. Instead of chocolate, I think I shall return to bed.